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Tuesday, June 23, 2015

Hello again, ready for summer!

Hello again! It's been so easy to neglect writing this finishing entry in the summer challenge. I guess that's part of the whole reason for this blog: it's easy to give up your initiatives, and to lack motivation. But the work of recovery demands the rigorous honesty of assessing the situation and the simple willingness to start again.

Here's the story of how I'm staying motivated despite a little detour.


I turned 30! At the end of May I headed south to Florida for a birthday celebration with friends. What's awesome is that on the 3rd day of vacation, I hit the 50% mark of loss, which is to say I weighed in at 232lbs! 

To underestimate this importance is to really give a negative spin towards the little hiatus I've taken in writing. My friends took me to Busch Gardens so I could ride roller coasters. I haven't been able to ride certain theme park rides for years because of my weight. When I look at the advantage list that I first wrote in treatment, I am so glad to check this off as a fulfillment of that original hope. 
(Sheikra at Busch Gardens Tampa)

Having accomplished these things, I feel in a certain way that my original goal since starting this journey has been met. I am so excited to share this news with you.

(Ringing in my 30th birthday with friends)

It's then that the 30th birthday came, I celebrated well with friends, and became a little less resistant with regard to the food for celebrations. I was also stressed at home, with some uncertainty with regard to where I would be serving for the future. My recent doctors visits also enter in, as we still have not determined the reason for why I am experiencing swelling in my leg. 

I remained really active during my vacation, also taking on biking outdoors frequently. I made the decision that upon return I would buy a bike. 

Coming home, I stepped on the scale. Whatever the factors, I had to deal with an 8 pound weight gain in the space of a week. After some water weight came off immediately, I estimate that there was still a 5-6 pound weight gain for the week. I felt discouraged by this, but did not give up tracking or reaching out to friends. 

I got right back on track, though I didn't take directly to writing about it. I had to connect with the idea that my recovery is still a process, my struggles are real, and I need to work through them. Writing exactly what I was feeling would take some time because various stress factors were still presenting themselves. I can say that after returning to my regular diet and exercise regimen, I have lost all the weight I gained. I have now crossed the 50% mark, weighing in at 229. When I started this process, 230 was my goal weight. I am so happy to have made that goal.
(Out biking, helmet on backwards)

I bought that bike, and have been out with friends biking. Little things to humble me: I found out I had my helmet on backwards, and recently the ball of my left foot has been aching so much I can't work out the way I would like. Nevertheless, the idea on the horizon would be to train for a triathlon. 

My weight goals have not been met yet. It's a struggle when I continue to assert this with some people. The reality is that I at least can stand to lose another 30lbs before we start talking about skin surgery. It's increasingly becoming an issue, as working with my trainer is helping to unearth those muscles and show the difference between what I hope will remain and what that excess skin looks like. 

I have to say that despite this pain in my foot, I feel the fittest I have ever been. I'm excited for the training with Erica to continue, because I have experienced lately a great surge in my muscular development. I have reframed this little blip in my weight as an important reminder that I need to remain faithful to my 12 steps and eating behaviors everyday. 

Just as "one day within his courts is better than a thousand elsewhere": Nothing tastes as good as abstinence feels! 

(Me and my niece at Six Flags)


Thursday, May 21, 2015

Summer Goal Challenge Week 7

Challenge Start: 245lbs 
Week 1: 242.4, -1.6
Week 2: 241, -1.4
Week 3: 241, +/- 0
Week 4: 237.2, -3.8
Week 5: 237.4, +.2
Week 6: 238.2, +.8

Week 7: 233.6, -4.6

Total: -11.4

I am 1 pound away from the 50% mark, which is absolutely amazing.

Last Saturday I ran the RunWestfield Flat Fast 5k in 35:40. 
I wanted a faster time, but my left quad was feeing the new training with Erica, and there was too much tension on the sprints I had been practicing. I am very happy that I improved my overall mile average, and even had a 10 minute mile. 

Since Monday, I've been on retreat at Guest House in Lake Orion, Michigan, as part of my continuing care for food addiction and weight loss. 
The campus, having welcomed the men's program from Rochester, MN since November, is a beautiful place to reflect with my brother priests in treatment about the continued recovery and journey ahead. 
The Chapel, newly dedicated, is filled with many elements from the chapel in Rochester. It is a not so subtle reminder that the spiritual heart of Guest House continues to beat, keeping alive the memory of all the recovery that has come before this new adventure in Lake Orion. 
(Continuing Care Phase I Sept, 2014 to Continuing Care Phase II May, 2015, -75lbs)

I look forward to maintaining my relationship with Guest House as I seek to help my brothers and sisters in ministry who struggle with food addiction and weight issues. There is a lot of room to grow here in Michigan, but I am glad that people are finding their own recovery in the Damascus Program. 



Thursday, May 14, 2015

Summer Goal Challenge Week 6

Challenge Start: 245lbs 
Week 1: 242.4, -1.6
Week 2: 241, -1.4
Week 3: 241, +/- 0
Week 4: 237.2, -3.8
Week 5: 237.4, +.2

Week 6: 238.2, +.8

Total: -6.8

I officially hit a plateau, and probably the first real significant one of this journey. Two weeks in a row, gaining only a pound back, which in the grand scheme of things isn't bad. Considering this last week, I'll take it!

The week started off great. I flew down to Florida, was able to train outside with a friend, and stayed active. My diet for one of the days was tracked, but way off what I normally eat. I did drink more than usual. But I felt good. 



Then the long car ride to Miami and a big weekend of preaching for Haiti Missions at St Patrick's in Miami Beach. I started to notice some swelling in my leg. I returned home a little nervous about the swelling.


When I got home I weighed myself, and the scale read 244. 7 pound gain? How could this be? Even my tracking couldn't account for it. After my workout, which was actually my last workout with Lamar as my trainer, I immediately decided to get my leg checked out. 

My doctor's office performed a blood test to see if there was a blood clot. The indicator came back positive, which meant I needed to go for an ultrasound at the emergency room. 6 hours later, the test determined there was no blood clot...thank Jesus! 

I continued to watch my salt and took my calories down a little for the rest of the week. It was good to be back at spin. It was also good to start with Erica as my new trainer. 

Getting back down to 238 meant that whatever happened, it did not signify my going off the deep end. I'm happy to still be losing weight and enjoying this wonderful life!

To Lamar, thanks for everything you've done for me. I've lost a total of 118 lbs since I started training with you April of 2014! Good luck in your new training job at another gym! 

Lastly, here's a pic that everyone loved on Facebook this week. I finally fit into a medium polo shirt. If you want some motivation and a reason to start tracking all your food and exercise...here you go!
March 10, 2014 (376.4lbs) to May 13, 2015 (240.6lbs). Considering my highest was 464, that picture isn't dramatic enough! 

Friday, May 8, 2015

Summer Goal Challenge Week 5

Challenge Start: 245lbs 
Week 1: 242.4, -1.6
Week 2: 241, -1.4
Week 3: 241, +/- 0
Week 4: 237.2, -3.8

Week 5: 237.4, +.2
Total: -7.6

It's been a rough week with a busy concert schedule and some professional stress. Physically speaking, my body has reacted to cafeteria food from the Sacred Concert weekend, and, as was noted by a new weight loss doctor, I have some inflammation going on. 

I loved going back to Northfield Mount Hermon to sing with friends I haven't seen since even before graduation (12 years ago...ahhhh). 

After my last doctor visit we scheduled a consult with a weight loss doctor. I wanted to know the numbers so that I can determine a healthy goal to get to. What's awesome is to find that my basal metabolic rate is high compared to my body size, which means that all the hard work has paid off. I have a BMR of 2750, meaning my usual diet of 2100-2300 is still in the weight loss category. 

Body fat percentage is hard to determine without a water bath system. The doctor I visited only had a bioelectric impedance test available. It estimated a body fat percentage of 26%. That's roughly half of what it used to be...and since I'm half the size, that means I've built up a lot of muscle mass along the journey. There is still room for major improvement, and we will get there by changing up some of the diet and focusing on causes of inflammation, and increasing strength training.

I didn't blog yesterday, on a travel day to visit friends in Florida. I'm here in St Pete for a quick pleasure trip and then to Miami to preach at a parish on behalf of the Diocese of Fort Liberte in Haiti. It will be my first mission appeal, and it will be a whirlwind 6 mass schedule. I hope to get to the gym at some point. Oh, and beach...lots of beach. 



Thursday, April 30, 2015

Summer Goal Challenge Week 4

Challenge Start: 245lbs 
Week 1: 242.4, -1.6
Week 2: 241, -1.4
Week 3: 241, +/- 0

Week 4: 237.2, -3.8
Total: -7.8

I broke 240 finally! It feels awesome to get through this little plateau. Today I met with a weight loss specialist to determine what my new basal metabolic rate is. He couldn't believe what my weight was, thinking I was actually lighter. That's exactly why I want this test done, eventually figuring out what my body fat percentage is, and how much skin will need to be removed. I weighed in on their scale at 235, by the way. The specialist threw out a number of 200 as a good goal. I want a more scientific answer to what my maintenance weight should be. 

My friend Fr Piotr and I drove down for a day off at the Mystic Seaport. It was a beautiful day, and I got to meet up with another friend, Erik, who is director of interpretation at the seaport. This was awesome because he hadn't seen me since before the transformation. He and his staff were very gracious and I recommend a trip down if you've never been! 




Thursday, April 23, 2015

Summer Goal Challenge Week 3

Challenge Start: 245lbs 
Week 1: 242.4, -1.6
Week 2: 241, -1.4

Week 3: 241, +/-0
Total: -4

To see no change this week is a little disappointing, considering I stepped up training and have been killing it in spin class. But I have to look at what's going on here. I've had to up the calories a bit to keep up with the workouts, have increased my protein intake to help build muscle, and have been taking my preworkouts with creatine more often. The result is likely muscle gain and water retention. Taking the calories down to about 2000 for this next week should help shed any excess. 

This process is still one day at a time, and I'm excited to see more muscle definition and strength, as well as faster sprints on the bike. I remain positive and am staying motivated for this challenge!

On last Friday I got to walk around the finish line of the Boston Marathon. Having seen it on Monday, even with all the rain, I'm determined that it will be in my future someday. I believe it will be possible if I run for a charity in 2017. 
Boston Strong!




Thursday, April 16, 2015

Summer Goal Challenge Week 2

Challenge start: 245
Week 1: 242.4, -2.6lbs

Week 2: 241, -1.4lbs, 
Total: -4lbs
Very happy with this week's results, as I inch closer to the 230's. With Erica back at spin, it's been great. Although, today I decided to do something absolutely insane. 


I got up at 5 for a 5:45am spin class with Art. The sun wasn't even up, but the moon was!